Seen and Heard by Angel Freyer

Do you see me?

I'm standing in a sea of people shouting.

Trying to be the loudest 

With my voice on mute.

Fighting to be seen.

To be chosen.

To live my dream.

Change my reality.

Waiting for permission to be free;

To BE.

To be ME.

In all of my sharp and pointy edges.

Boiling hot temper.

An ocean of sadness that ebs and flows.

Neurotic and at times chaotic.

BIG LOVE.

Warm and fuzzy core.

Do you hear me? 

Singing "How do you love me right now?!"

At the top of my lungs.

In my living room, when no one is around. 

I do my best performances alone with no one to applaud.

Fear.

I am afraid to be seen.

Afraid to be heard.

I run from my audience's gaze.

 

For all the fear, 

that gives me the excuse not to try

There is also pure joy and happiness

When you do see me.

When you hear me. 

Funny thing is

I live for the accolades 

The applause.

When I allow you to see,

I marvel at the smile on your face. 

And how any and all doubt disappears 

And for just a moment, 

The weight of existing is gone.